Monday, October 02, 2006

Walking My Talk

It wasn't too long ago that I wrote about a book I was reading that had the potential to change the way I look at a lot of things (Greg Boyd's "The Myth Of A Christian Nation"). As a part of that post I mentioned my regret at telling a gay family member that their partner was not welcome at our family camping trip. I thought that allowing the partner to join us might have given us a chance to share the love of God with them, rather than "shutting out the sinners" which I couldn't see Jesus doing. By the time I wrote that post the couple had split up, so I was really writing in retrospect. Theoretical. Hypothetically.

Yesterday that same family member told us that they've met someone new, they're dating again, and that this is the most wonderful person you could ever hope to meet. Good grief.

Needless to say, we're distressed by this news. And it's so incredibly awkward! We want to be happy for them, because they've found someone who makes them happy. But how can we be?

We want to be supportive, but we can't be. I haven't yet figured out how to even be in the same city without either appearing to bless their relationship, or running them off with a long pointy finger. Family is supposed to be a safe place, away from the battle, where you can find unconditional love, comfort and support. I think we need to be that place, and I think we have been. But man, it's getting tough.

It would be the easiest thing in the world (for a part of me) to forget about the words I wrote in that other post, and whip out that long pointy finger. But we also shun the "God hates fags!" model of evangelism. I think my challenge will be to find a way to *not* endorse their lifestyle, while at the same time leaving the light on for them at the door to heaven.


Blogger Amanda said...

I can definitely relate to where you're coming from. But I think you answered your own question. You said, "Family is supposed to be a safe place, away from the battle, where you can find unconditional love, comfort and support." I imagine that this family member already knows where you stand on the issue of homosexuality. He/she doesn't need pointed fingers anymore.

But what would Jesus do? Jesus ate with prostitutes and tax collectors. He would do the same with a gay family member. He would love them. He would spend time with them. He would show them the light without condemning them. I think you would do so much for the kingdom if you showed both your family member and his/her partner unconditional love, despite the lifestyle they lead.

October 07, 2006 2:32 PM  
Blogger DErifter said...

Thanks Amanda,

It feels good to hear that from another Christian. There will always be tension over this relationship, but we have no choice but to work through it.

October 09, 2006 6:31 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home